Well, this is my 100th post and I was hoping for it to be something upbeat and excited.

Instead, all I feel lately is frustration.

It’s been two weeks since my latest post. For me, that feeling is frustrating. Every time I sit down to write something, the words just slip away. Or sometimes my brain is swirling so fast, all I can pick out are random words. If I tried to lay them out, it would just be a jumbled mess. Maybe that’s what I need to do, because I feel like that would be an accurate representation of my life right now: A jumbled mess.

Planning a wedding from 450 miles away is challenging.Things have been falling into place lately, but there certainly have been snags along the way. It took 3 trips to Pittsburgh just to pick a venue. We’re only about halfway done with our marriage preparation that’s required by the Catholic Church. The bridesmaid dresses turned into an ordeal in itself, and brought out my inner bridezilla for a bit. Luckily that crisis has been smoothed over, and all the dresses are hanging safely in a closet at my mother’s house along with mine.

Chris and I have made the decision to go back to Pittsburgh. As much as I absolutely adore my friends here, I miss my family. And realistically Chris and I cannot afford to buy anything in Chicago. I figured if we’re going to end up in the suburbs anyway, we might as well go back to Pennsylvania and be with family. So now we’re beginning the process of looking for houses. With that comes looking for cars for both of us, looking for new jobs, and planning a whole different budget than what we’re used to. Even though I know moving back is probably the best decision, I can’t help but feel disappointed. I thought moving away from Pittsburgh would be a life changing experience where I would grow as a person. While it definitely has been, I never expected things to come full circle and have me end up back where I started. But on the plus side, Chris and I will be getting a place with at least 3 bedrooms so all my friends will have an open invitation to come stay with us anytime.

The super secret project I may (or may not) have mentioned finally launched a few weeks ago so I can finally say I have been doing some freelance writing for Appolicious and it’s been a lot of fun. But I do notice on days when I’m writing my reviews or doing research, my own blog suffers. I just feel frustrated that sometimes I’m not a constant fountain of words and ideas that continue to flow and never dry up. But guess what? I’m only human, and I realized my brain does have its limitations.

And wow-for someone who’s feeling frustrated at my state of writers block, those previous 475 words just poured right out. The whole purpose of me blogging from the very beginning is to use it as an extension of myself; I don’t ever want it to feel like a job or a chore. I don’t ever want to be like “ugh, I haven’t written a post in a week. I really need to go home and write one” because obviously I shouldn’t bother writing one in that case. I have enough frustrations in life and blogging is supposed to help me work through that, not add more frustration to the mix.


No apologies here though. No excuses.


Just a little insight, and some explanation.